These scenarios are intended to provide conversation starters for teen girls and a skilled and caring mentor. They can also be used in group settings, but an adult guide should still be present to provide perspective and wisdom. The cards address many challenging situations in which young girls might find themselves.
o Scenarios worksheets (attached – 1 per person) or “Conversation Starters for Teenage Girls – Cards” (a file that you can download at www.teachingthem.com on the Lesson and Material Downloads page.
o Something to write with (if you use the worksheet – 1 per person)
o Something to write on (if you use the worksheet – 1 per person)
o Review the scenarios and delete or pull out any that you don’t want to address.
o Print the worksheets (1 per person) or the scenario cards (1 per group)
o Practice the script.
Use the following script (or modify to suit your needs):
- “There are many challenging situations facing teenage girls today.”
- “If you haven’t thought about how you will prepare for them or respond to them, they could surprise you, and you might find yourself under pressure to make the wrong decision.”
- “Today, we are going to ask you to think about some of these situations and give your opinion about how you should prepare for or respond to them.” (If you are using the worksheet, pass it out now, and let the girls have 15-20 minutes to complete it. You can then discuss their answers as a group, or you can have them turn them in so that you can review them before discussing them at your next meeting. If you are using the cards, lay them face-down in the center of the group, and have the girls take turns drawing one and responding to it. Then, allow the other girls to share their thoughts, as well. Sometimes what they say will be enough on the topic, but at other times, you may need to redirect them by sharing your perspective. Whenever possible, reference biblical principles.)
Take some time, and read through each of the following scenarios. Write how you think you should handle each situation on a separate sheet of paper. Be sure to number your answers.
1. You and your boyfriend have been dating for three months. Recently, he has begun to bring up the subject of sex to get your opinion on it. He says that he wouldn’t ever want to do anything that you didn’t want to do, but you can tell that he is hoping you will say it is okay.
2. One of your girlfriends confessed to you that she has been thinking about suicide. Her parents have been fighting for years and are now going through a divorce. She is unpopular at school, and the boys make fun of her because she is heavy. Recently, she has even stopped turning in her homework, and her failing grades are getting her into trouble with her parents and with school administrators.
3. At a party, a popular girl invites you to join her and her friends as they take hits of acid. You initially say, “No, thanks….I’m okay,” but they begin to make fun of you for being so “straight” and “pure.” They laugh at you and tell you it’s time to grow up and stop being such a little girl.
4. You are out driving on a date with a cute boy, and he reaches across you to open the glove compartment of his car. As he does so, his arm brushes your chest. You are embarrassed, but he is very apologetic, so you say it was no big deal. However, an hour later, he does the same thing at dinner as he reaches for the ketchup.
5. You and a girlfriend are out at the mall. As she reaches to pick out a bracelet that she likes, you see that she has several dark bruises on her arm under her shirtsleeve. When you ask her about it, she says that she bumped into something, but you aren’t convinced. The bruises look like finger marks from her arm being squeezed too hard. You keep asking her about it until she confesses that her boyfriend got angry the other day and shook her a little. She assures you that it’s the first time anything like this has ever happened.
6. The word is out all over school about a famous celebrity sex video, and you are surprised to find that someone has sent you the link through email. Your friend is watching over your shoulder when you open the email and tells you that you should click on the link. “Everyone has seen it except us,” she says.
7. Report cards come out, and you are surprised to see that you got a “B” in a class that you should have failed. You didn’t turn in three assignments this semester, and you’ve been dreading getting your grades. What was even more surprising is that your teacher commented on how much you’ve improved in getting your homework done. You’re pretty sure that he made some kind of mistake in his grade book, but you are reluctant to bring it up, because an “F” means you will be grounded and miss this weekend’s social.
8. A friend has started to look tired all the time. She has dark patches under her eyes, and she no longer seems to have any energy or spark. She has also been losing a lot of weight, which is confusing, because she eats more than you or any of your other friends. You’ve begun to wonder if she might be throwing up whenever she goes to the bathroom after you eat out together.
9. It is obvious to you that the girls who wear the tightest clothing and the shortest skirts get the most attention from the guys. You’ve always been modest in what you wear, but it hurts that none of the guys is ever interested in you. One guy even asked you why you wear “old lady” clothes.
10. You’re out at the movies with a guy. When he opens his wallet to pay for your tickets, you notice that he has several condoms in it.
11. You catch your older brother looking at a pornographic magazine in his room. He first begs you not to tell, then threatens to get you back if you say anything to Mom or Dad.
12. You wake up late one night when you hear a noise in the dark. You look out your window and see your older sister sneaking back into her room. You look at the clock and see that it’s 4:30 a.m. The next morning, your parents tell you to wake up your sister, and you smell alcohol on her breath when you go to get her.
13. You’ve got a new teacher – a young guy just out of college, and he is really cute. All the girls are talking about him. One day, he asks you to stay for a few minutes after class so that he can talk to you about your last paper. He is very excited about your writing abilities and tells you that you have talent. This meeting is followed by several others, and he offers to coach you to help you really develop your writing skills. You have been meeting a few times a week after school for several weeks, and one day at your meeting, he reaches out and puts his hand on yours.
14. One of your girlfriends just found out that she is pregnant. She says that there is no way she can have a baby. Her parents would do something crazy like sending her to live with her aunt in another state. Her boyfriend is trying to help her raise the money for the abortion pill, and she has asked if you can help out with a little money.
15. One of the girls in your first period class is upset, because someone stole her iPod out of her backpack. This girl is really irritating and has always been mean to you, and you are a little amused to see that something bad has finally happened to her. Unfortunately, you know who stole the iPod. You saw one of your good friends listening to it yesterday after school, and you know it is the same iPod because of a scratch that it has on the back cover.
16. You are at a school social with some friends. When it is time to leave, you realize that the friend who drove you there has been drinking and is in no condition to drive. You offer to drive for her, but she refuses and says that she is just fine.
17. You are at a concert with some friends, and someone passes a joint down the row of seats. You expect your friends to pass it back the other way, but to your surprise, they all take a hit and then pass it to you. When you start to refuse, they begin to tease you and put the joint in your face. They say that you are going to get high off the second-hand smoke anyway – why not enjoy it all the way?
18. You’ve told your parents that you are going to a sleepover at a friend’s house, but when you get there, you find out that the girls have planned a secret trip to a local dance club. They are busy getting dressed and putting on make-up so that they look “legal,” and one of the girls says that she is a good friend with the gatekeeper at the door. He promised that he would let them all in as long as they looked old enough.
19. While at the mall one weekend, you and your girlfriend meet a couple of cute guys. They are from your school, but you don’t really know them. You eat together at one of the fast-food places, and then the guys ask if the two of you can give them a ride home. When you hesitate, they say, “Come on, it’s not far from here. It will only take you a few minutes.”
20. You get a friend request from someone on Facebook. You don’t recognize the name, but they have lots of the same friends as you, so you approve the request. As soon as you do, the person starts to chat with you. You start to chat while looking up his profile. Unfortunately, you still don’t recognize him, but he looks pretty normal in his photos and he goes to the same high school as you. He is asking you questions about what you like to do on the weekends and when you aren’t working on homework.